Saturday 5 September 2015

One-Sided Love? Have you ever loved someone who did not love you back?

When we are loving towards someone and are looking forward to take the relationship forward but do not receive the equivalent signals from him/her is for me a perfect description of a 'one-sided love'. It is all a play of emotions and that is what adds complexity to the matter as 'strong emotions' drive men and women insane. I think when logic and emotions are battling each other, it is the emotions that mostly triumph over logic and reasoning. This is precisely why when we fall for someone and continue yearning them even after becoming aware that they aren't interested in us. Reason says - "Move on" & Emotions says - "Persevere till you make her/him love you".

I have fallen into the one-sided love stories more than once and here is a list of things that will help you understand and handle a situation like that in a way that will lead to freedom (from pain) & happiness.

  1. Like I said before, it is all a play of emotions within you that make you yearn for that person and if these emotions are kept unchecked then they will drive you insane. Period. The solution is to catch yourself the moment you feel like you are getting romantically inclined towards someone and balance those emotions with strong reasoning. Ask yourself sensible questions that will help you get the right perspective.
  2. Try befriending new people.If possible, try connecting with like minded people specially from the opposite gender. I do not have any sound backing for the reason why I mentioned 'opposite gender' but I have noticed that whenever I added new female friends (I mean pure friendship and nothing else) to my social life it helped me get my emotional inclination towards that "one girl" under control. But, I have always kept my values under check, as I did not make friends just to get over my one-sided love relationships. In fact I am proud to say that many friends in past few years that I made while going through that phase, are still there with me and have we all have now become best buddies
  3. The final key is to make yourself understand that any relationship needs a minimum of two pillars to balance itself and not one. You can surely try getting closer to them and understand them, support them and love them for all that they are but in no way can you make them fall in love with you. However, if your love is so true that you can even take bullets for them, then they need to be matured enough to see the truthfulness of your love and take the next step towards you with no doubts in mind.