Monday 17 August 2015

You make them feel good, but why do you feel low?

I have been in situations where being an empath has resulted in a heavy draining of my own positivity. However, that does not make it bad, as life is not always a sunshine. In order to dispel the darkness created by sorrows and depression or regrets or absolutely anything that 'does not feel good' we all need empathy from those who know/understand us or perhaps from anyone at all (specially when we are in desperate need of it).

My experiences have made me realize a few things that one needs to know about empathy (these are from a standpoint of an empath) and I can sum it up in two points for you.

When you allow yourself to understand them and their issues and detect the emotional pain in them that needs healing through counselling (which is precisely what empaths do directly or indirectly), it ends up lowering your own battery of positive energy. Their situation may or may not improvise, but our heavy investment of wisdom, words and time costs us emotional weakness. Sometimes making us feel blue without even knowing why we are feeling that way.
They may end up becoming depended on you as they begin seeing in you a strong source of understanding and support (I think of these as the two really important pillars of empathy) they will start coming to you every time they feel low, thereby making them further weak because now they are slowly getting into the practice that will sooner or later make them incapable of healing their own selves. After all how long can they rely on you? Forever?

The key is to give them some space because that will allow them time to build their emotional and mental muscle. Once, the strength gets build up then you can play the role of a motivator who will simply connect them with their 'own stronger self within' whenever required.

He is busy working for you, while you are enjoying your day off.. WHO IS HE/SHE?

Whenever I shop in a mall or talk to a Call Centre agent at 2 am in the morning to reschedule my flight booking, I just can't help but feel grateful for all the wonderful things that I am blessed with.
Why do I feel that way? Read on and allow this one to sink in...

It is a festive holiday and I am shopping in a Mall for a new cell phone and there is a salesperson on the other side of the counter helping me make an informed choice about the cell phone that I should buy. I end up window shopping and leave the kiosk without buying anything. He greets me with a smile as I leave his vicinity, his eyes looking at other people who are ready with their set of questions. The smile is still ON. 

As I now drive back home, I am flooded with thoughts of gratitude that makes me thank God in all sincerity for His endless blessings, (believe me, enjoying my time on a festive holiday spending time doing a little window shopping is just one of them).

If you are reading this, I request you to make it a point of greeting them and speaking three simple words 'How are you?' with a smile, whether you are in front of a salesperson in that store or talking to a call centre agent on the phone, doing this will not cost you a buck but it makes them feel valued and that is an incredible feeling for most of them if not all.

Trust me, I have been a call centre agent for more than 2 years and I know exactly how it feels like.